The Benefits of Dykedom

Being thought of as a loudmouth lesbian does have it’s minor benefits. Not only do most boys take the hint and keep their distance, but also I get out of the end of term ‘Easter Service’.

The Easter Service is taken the group of evangelical fanatics who form the cliquish school Scripture Union. Granted, many of them are my friends, however we have locked horns many times of issues of theological authority and then generally being hypocritical and judgemental. The Easter Service when I first started the school was one or two hymns, a prayer and the school notices, but since my peers have some through the ranks, it is now an all singing, all dancing, half hour ‘Praise’ fest.

I do know that for the SU girls, the Easter Service is a super important event in their social calendar. For the rest of the school it is an unnecessary chance for them to shove their perfection (or supposed perfection) down our noses.

The result of this cliquey religious drama is that most of the school try to avoid making it, being ‘accidentally’ late, walking the long way to it, or just leaving school before it.

I go for the latter, enjoying my lunch at home while they prance and dance and sing about lambs and love. Today as I walked away from the Assembly Hall, I encountered a teacher taking on the role of shepherd:

“You’re all going to be late! Hurry up! The Headmaster is ready to start already!”

Indeed, I almost expected to be steered back, however this teacher knows I’m gay. She also believes all lesbians are heathen. Therefore when she said ‘Are you not going?’ and I said ‘No. Have a nice Easter holiday.’ No more questions were asked.

Of course I should have attacked her for her stereotypical view. However that would have eaten into my holiday time.