Running *

It seems to me there are two major types of lesbians – the hunter and the hunted. Those who pursue, and those who are pursued. These brackets don’t necessarily fit into any pre conceived butch/femme stereotypes, but I think it’s fair to say I’m usually the more passive partner in the beginning.

I seem to prefer to wait around till someone notices me, than taking the more proactive role. And this works for me. I’m not saying they are flocking around the block, but I get a few offers.

The thing that really throws me is when I am forced to do the running. I genuinely feel totally out of my depth. What do I do or say? Everything I seem to try makes me feel like an overgrown adolescent boy.

When I do the running it’s because I really like a person, as much as I like to pretend this isn’t the reason. My arms and legs grow to unreasonable proportions, my voice goes up a semitone, and I make a tit out of myself.

Am I doomed to just wait, and generally depress myself by embarrassing myself in front of the few people I really like?

*Seeing as I feel like an angsty teen, I can use angst sparingly in this post.